Sunday, Sep 26, 2021

Musings – Pre-Pesach Noises

Each Yom Tov has its special sounds The ones that are unique But Pesach has its special sounds The laugh, the cry, the shriek It starts almost Four weeks before Mishloach manos messes And who gets the job of cleaning up? (I'll leave you with three guesses!)

And suddenly, the laughs and shouts
The sounds of Purim cheer

Have turned into the shrieks and pouts

The sounds of chometz fear!

 

“We have too many

Pretzel bags

Please dump them at your school!

It’s after Purim

Leave them there

You know we have a rule!”

 

“Who left these crumbs

And cookie dough?”

“This room was cleaned!”

“I didn’t know!”

 

What happened to the vacuum?

It never seems to work!

The hose is stuffed with pizza crusts!

And I’m going berserk!

 

Chaim’s coming

From the Mir!

And Ettil’s in from sem!

Zvi’s got a ride from Lakewood

I think at 4 a.m.!

 

And Bashy’s coming

From out west

I’d get them if I can!

But they have 20 suitcases

And we don’t have a van!

 

“You just brought home a pizza?!

Are you out of your mind?

You think I’m here to clean the mess?

Of stuff you leave behind?

 

“You’re treifing up my dishes!

Your bedroom is a mess!

Take that junk

And eat outside!

You’re causing me distress!

 

I ask the kids to help clean up

They says they’re “going learning”

Suddenly, they’re tzaddikelach

With such a drive and yearning!

 

But mornings, I do wonder

As they lie there in their beds

What does it take

For them to wake?

Water on their heads?

 

Do they have any maror left?

Those kids make me insane

It’s not Shabbos Hagadol and

They ate all the Romaine!

 

“Yankel, are you going out?

Please get me a few things”

And somehow all

But what she asked

Is what her Yankel brings!

 

“You mean she is not coming?

She says she has the flu?

Her brother in Honduras died?

Whatever will I do?

 

“Would you clean out your knapsacks?

“You think I am your maid?

“You know what this would cost you

“If ever I was paid?”

 

Moish does not know jewelry

He doesn’t mind the price

“My wife has worked so hard this year

Please, just give me something nice!”

 

“Did you pick up the cleaners stuff

I sent two months ago?

Your kittel‘s turning colors

Next to a tuxedo!

 

“My shaitel is a total wreck!

I wore it in the rain!”

“Ma! Do I need to get new shoes?

‘Cause getting them’s a pain!”

 

“Ma! I need new shoes for Yom Tov!

Not got ones for a while!”

“What’s wrong with those you just got”

“Oh! They’ve just gone out of style!”

 

And as the days draw closer

And sweet smells fill the air

Suddenly it’s calmer

‘Cause Pesach is soon here

 

Maybe it’s the tablecloth

Maybe matzoh tashes

Maybe it’s the kinderlach

Waiting for the kashas

 

Maybe it’s the spirit

Of really getting free

That sends some calm in every house

With true tranquility

 

And all the havoc

And the noise

A thing it does not mean

When Seder night

We do alight

On thrones like king and queen

 

And soon our little princes

And princesses as well

Listen quiet, with intent

As history we tell

 

And as the Seder ends, they sleep

And silently they’re glowing

Until on Chol Hamoed, they scream…

“TOTTY! WHERE WE GOING?!”

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