Sunday, Dec 4, 2022

Musings – Post-Pesach Noises

Don't think, my friend That Yom Tov sounds Are heard only before For after Pesach's over You will hear even more! Are all the counters Put away? Can you get off the goo? There is still tape stuck on the wood I don't know what to do! The neighbors left us 15 keys And went to some hotel Where I put them I don't know And they just called my cell!

Ma! I’m leaving in three days

I’m pumped and truly wired

But I don’t know

If I can go!

My passport has expired!

 

I’m going back to sem again

What will my teachers say?

I mamish had a yeridah

Because I went away!

 

I haven’t learned Shiurei Daas

It mamish doesn’t paas

How can chutz la’aretz rate

To a Yerushalmi gaas?

 

Why are there fifty seltzers

Sitting in the closet?

“Ma!” he said

“I’m saving them

To get back the deposit!”

 

“Who saw my Borsalino hat?

It’s only two weeks old!

“Did Eliezer sit on it?”

He screamed as his eyes rolled

 

Who’s going to the cleaners

We have six suits to clean

2 kittels and just 20 shirts

And skirts about 13!

 

I have to do a Costco!

Of course a Gourmet Glatt

And then I’ll go right back again

To get stuff I forgot

 

Yeshiva starts tomorrow

For those of you in town

And those who start Rosh Chodesh

Please just don’t “hang around”

 

The phone is ringing off the hook

Perhaps you have a ride?

I’ll chap the best bed in the dorm

I got a guy inside!

 

I threw out all the makeup

That’s what my morah said

So I must get a whole new set!

(I know, Ma, nothing red!)

 

I have to get right back on track

A week I’ve missed the daf!

I can’t come to the Meadowlands

And see the oilam scoff!

 

My boss, he isn’t happy

He says there’s work to do

While I shvitzed in my office

You dreyed in the Bronx Zoo!

 

Yes, Pesach now is over

And crumbs are coming back

And chometz will be everywhere

In every kid’s knapsack

 

And soon we’ll have to clean again

But I would rather worry

That Moshiach should come soon

And we’ll leave in a hurry!

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