Wednesday, Nov 6, 2024

  “Meiheicha Teisi?”

 

Have you ever heard those words?

Those of us who grew up in yeshivos or live or lived in homes where the men grew up in yeshivos never stopped hearing those words. The words, which appear in the Gemara, literally mean, “From where are you going to bring [proof]?” In our parlance, we would say, “Who says?” or, “Prove it!”

Those of us who grew up in yeshivos have a tremendous maalah, a tremendous positive attribute. We don’t take anything at face value. Gemara learning sharpens the brain and teaches you that everything should be analyzed and turned over. Just because this is the way things are done is not proof that it is right.

This “meiheicha teisi” persona causes us to constantly question – question others, question what we hear, and look at things with a critical eye. For example, as soon as we see an ad in a paper or on a billboard, we try to think about how the guy who made the ad is “working on us,” trying to convince us to buy whatever product he is selling.

When there is a sign hanging in a shul or yeshiva, we are the ones who sit and analyze what the real message behind the sign is.

Like any middah, that maalah, that positive attribute, brings with it a negative component as well. Let us say that most of us don’t naturally cultivate the middah of temimus.

Another byproduct of this middah is the fact that just as we question the motivation of others, we are also constantly questioning our own motives, and not only our own motives, but also our own conclusions. When a person proposes a sevara, even if he thinks that it is a good one, the next day he will think it over and question it, always wondering if there is perhaps something wrong with it. When a person decides to do something, he may question himself and wonder, “Did I have negius when I decided what I did?”

The Hardest Part of Sukkos? Being B’simcha

This brings us to Sukkos. We know that Sukkos is Zeman Simchaseinu, a time of tremendous simcha. As the Vilna Gaon would say, the most difficult mitzvah is to constantly remain joyous throughout the Yom Tov.

One of the reasons for this simcha, seforim explain, is the fact that Sukkos comes right after Yom Kippur, that exalted day of selicha v’kapparah. On Sukkos, our neshamos are not weighed down by the massive down-pull of our aveiros. We are thus able to much more easily access simcha.

“But Who Says?!”

This brings me to the “meiheicha teisi” moment. Several years ago, I was shmoozing with someone between Yom Kippur and Sukkos, describing what amazing days are coming. “After all,” I told him, “Hashem has just been mochel us on Yom Kippur and we can walk into the sukkah, the tzeil of Hashem, clean from the filth of our aveiros. There is almost nothing better than that!”

What did this person answer me? He said, “Meiheicha teisi?” In essence, he was saying, “How do I know that all my aveiros were forgiven? Maybe I didn’t do teshuvah properly. After all, the Rambam says that teshuvah has to be so comprehensive that Hashem can testify that the person will not return to that aveirah.”

If I would have only known Rav Shlomo Hoffman’s seforim at the time of our conversation a few years ago, I would have told this person what Rav Chatzkel Sarna, rosh yeshiva of Chevron, told Rav Shlomo when Rav Shlomo pulled out the same Rambam. I would have told him, “We don’t pasken like the Rambam. We pasken like Rabbeinu Yonah, who says that you just have to be on the ‘derech’ of teshuvah. You have to embark on the path of wanting to do and trying to do teshuvah. That is already considered to be teshuvah!”

A Pivotal Point to Remember

What I did tell him were the words of the Sifri on the posuk in last week’s parsha on the words “Vatiskach Keil mecholelecha.” The posuk is giving mussar. It is saying that we Yidden forgot Hashem, Who was mecholelecha, Who created us.

The Sifri, however, says something else. He says, “Mecholelecha is really two words in one. The two words are ‘Shemachol loch – Who has already been mochel you.’”

What does the Sifri mean?

Perhaps the Sifri is saying that even when Hashem has already been mochel us on Yom Kippur for our aveiros, we forget that He was mochel us or we say, “Meiheicha teisi?”

Do you know what that “meiheicha teisi” does? It causes us to do the same aveiros again. Why? Because if we would really believe that we are truly clean, we would not return to the same old aveiros so quickly. When you think you are still dirty, you don’t mind getting a bit dirtier, but when you are pristinely clean, you think twice about getting yourself dirty.

Remembering the Return of the Ananei Hakavod

Now, we all know that one of the reasons for the mitzvah of sukkah is that it is a remembrance of the Ananei Hakavod, the clouds that enveloped the Yidden. This year, a friend shared an amazing idea from Rav Yitzchok Hutner brought in his sefer Pachad Yitzchok. Rav Hutner says that the remembrance to the Ananei Hakavod does not mean the original Ananei Hakavod, but rather the return of the Ananei Hakavod after the sin of the Eigel. Rav Hutner cites a Medrash that explains how, after the terrible sin of the Eigel, the Ananei Hakavod that had enveloped the Bnei Yisroel suddenly left. Klal Yisroel was no longer worthy of the Ananei Hakavod.

On Yom Kippur, however, we know that Hashem acquiesced to Moshe Rabbeinu’s tefillos and bakashos on behalf of the Yidden and said, “Solachti.” The Medrash says that even though Hashem said, “Solachti,” the Ananei Hakavod did not return until the first day of Sukkos, and that is why there is such profound simcha on Sukkos, for it signifies that the relationship of the Yidden with Hashem was completely repaired.

A Ruined Relationship…Restored

Let me give a moshol to illustrate this point.

Moshe and Aharon had been childhood friends. They spent hours playing together and eventually went to yeshiva together. During their teen years, Aharon began to show signs of great potential in learning. He became a tremendous masmid and was offered a wonderful shidduch with a highly respected rabbinic family. He became a tremendous talmid chochom and over the years was offered the coveted position of rov of a prominent community.

Moshe, his childhood friend, also married and became a fine, ehrliche baal habayis. Despite the difference in their lifestyles and positions, they remained very close friends, maintaining their strong bond. Not only that, but the two friends maintained an interesting custom. Every Rosh Chodesh, Moshe would go to Aharon’s house, and they would spend time together shmoozing, catching up on life and just enjoying each other’s company.

One year, the Jewish community in the city where they lived found itself in upheaval. The beloved shochet of the town was in trouble. Yankel the shochet had been shechting for years. He was a very nice guy, and everyone loved him. However, someone had raised doubts about the kashrus of his shechitah, and after spending much time researching and delving into the matter, the rov of the town, R’ Aharon, came out with a kol korei sadly proclaiming that R’ Yankel’s shechitah should not be relied upon.

Moshe, who was a very good friend of the shochet, saw the sign and was furious. How could Aharon do such a thing? He was so upset that he became one of the heads of those in town who battled against the psak of the rov, defending Yankel.

The rov knew that Moshe was one of the chief fighters against him, and Moshe himself realized that he could no longer maintain his relationship with R’ Aharon. Months went by and they didn’t see each other. The machlokes eventually ended. The shochet moved out of town, but Moshe still could not bring himself to meet R’ Aharon.

Finally, one day, he decided, “Enough is enough. I must try to repair things with Aharon.”

He went to the rov’s house and, with his heart beating quickly and his hand shaking and clammy, he knocked on the door. R’ Aharon went to the door. Upon seeing his old friend Moshe, he embraced and hugged him. Moshe broke down and began to cry, begging his old friend to be mochel him.

“Mochel loch!” R’ Aharon reassured him. “I am completely mochel you! Don’t worry.”

By the time Moshe left, he was thrilled that his sin had been forgiven. At the same time, he had a niggling feeling that things would never be the same as before. “After all,” he thought to himself, “I betrayed my closest friend…”

Three weeks later, there was a knock on Moshe’s door. It was R’ Aharon’s attendant, saying, “It is Rosh Chodesh today. R’ Aharon is wondering why you are not coming…”

Moshe ran to R’ Aharon’s house, and this time he was crying tears of happiness. Not only was R’ Aharon fully mochel him, but he wanted the relationship to be exactly the way it had been!

That is what Hashem was showing us with the return of the Ananei Hakavod: that our relationship had been completely repaired.

Yes, the yeitzer hara has this way of making us say, “Meiheicha teisi,” but the fact is that Hashem was mochel us just a few days ago on Yom Kippuri, and that is why, as we enter the sukkah and spend time there, we should be so happy.

Just remember that, and don’t say, “Meiheicha teisi?”

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