I came across a wonderful uplifting story. It is very inspiring, but it also teaches us a sharp lesson. It is not good to fool other people. But it is even worse to fool ourselves. In the house of Kotzk, they used to say, “‘Do not steal’ is not the ultimate sin. Fooling yourself is much worse” (Rabbi Yehudah Leib Levin, The Lions of Kotzk, page 118; Emes V’Emunah page 77).
Rav Simcha Wasserman, son of Rav Elchonon who was murdered by the Nazis al kiddush Hashem, built and spread Torah all over the globe. Although I only met him a few times, he left an indelible impression on me and changed my life and goals. Toward the end of his life, he learned b’chavrusa with Rabbi Shlomo Lorentz, member of the Knesset and a confidant of many gedolei Yisrael. It is well-known that Rav Simcha and his rebbetzin passed away very close to each other and left behind no children. Reb Shlomo was niftar on Rosh Chodesh Cheshvan, two days before the petirah of Rav Simcha, and had left a tzava’ah that he wished to be buried next to his esteemed chavrusa. He did this as a chesed so that when his children came to visit his kever and say Tehillim and Kaddish, they would do so for Rav Simcha and his rebbetzin as well. Since Hashem runs the world, He arranged that the Lorentz children could not come to the cemetery on the two days of Rosh Chodesh Cheshvan, so they would always arrive on the yahrzeit of Rav Simcha as well.
It has been noted that when someone wishes to perform a chesed shel emes, Hashem helps them make it happen perfectly. Thus, Reb Shlomo’s final wish to do chesed even in death was fulfilled in the best of ways.
Paroh, on the other hand, was full of irrational egotism and lived a life of sheker. In this week’s haftorah (Yechezkel 29:3), Hashem says to Paroh, “Behold I am against you Paroh, king of Egypt…who has said, ‘Mine is my river and I have made myself [powerful].’” The Medrash (see Yalkut Shimoni, Shemos, No. 181) understands this to mean that Paroh was literally claiming that he had created the Nile, which was the idol of Egypt. Was Paroh actually such a fool? We also know that Paroh would attempt to convince his followers that he didn’t require a bathroom, since he was divine (Shemos 7:15). What was he thinking? The answer is that he wasn’t. Self-centered people, egocentric maniacs, can eventually convince themselves of the big lie that they have been foisting for a lifetime on others.
Our sedra this week tells the story of how Paroh’s necromancers attempted to imitate the miracles Aharon brought about with the snakes and the staff. Paroh’s experts threw down their sticks, which also turned into snakes, but Aharon’s staff swallowed up all the Egyptian staffs. The Gemara (Shabbos 97b) explains that this was a “miracle inside a miracle,” since it was a lifeless stick that swallowed all the Egyptian sticks. The Ramban adds that Paroh’s henchmen performed two types of sorcery. One was only sleight of hand, like all modern magicians. But the other was actually their proficiency in the ancient art of magic. Rav Eliyahu Hakohein of Izmir, author of Shevet Mussar (in his Sefer Chut Shel Chesed, page 58), explains that Hashem revealed the Egyptians’ deception by demonstrating that the Egyptians had never actually changed one thing into another.
The Shevet Mussar goes on to derive Hashem’s purpose in this object lesson to Paroh and by extension to the rest of us. Don’t try to fool the world, because you will end up fooling yourself and that will be your downfall. Paroh’s ego and self-delusions destroyed him and his entire empire in the end. As Rav Tzadok Hakohein of Lublin teaches at length throughout his commentary on the Haggadah, Klal Yisroel had box seats to watch the greatest lessons learned on the backs of the Egyptians. Each makkah exposed a different fallacy in the beliefs of the Mitzrim led by their liar-in-chief, Paroh. All of this began when he realized that his necromancers couldn’t create or even change anything, other than for a brief distraction. On the other hand, when a decent person, such as Rabbi Shlomo Lorentz, truly wanted to use his own death for chesed, the Creator of the world helped him bring about his pure intention.
I bring this up because of a disturbing fact that came to me. We have all heard about the wonderful minhag that was distorted called toameha. I will confess to sharing some toameha kugel every Erev Shabbos with one of my grandsons as we review some shiurim he learned during the week. I shep nachas, my ainikel enjoys the kugel, and we enter Shabbos on a “good high.” But, my dear friends, there is no alcohol in sight. Nor should there be! What I heard was that a certain Orthodox shul was having a poker night for their youth. Is this really what we want our children to remember that their shuls taught them? What have some people done to our beautiful minhagim?
While we are at it, why are there any alcoholic drinks served at any Kiddush, shalom zachor or other occasion? Why are we allowing our friends to become shikkur or even diminished rather than spiritually elevated? Is this Aharon’s miraculous staff or Paroh’s hallucinations of power with no sense of reality, decency or the consequences of our actions? Do we want to leave a Paroh legacy to our children and families or one like Rabbi Shlomo Lorentz?
As has been pointed out about the snakes and the sticks, even the most hated of creatures, the snake, can be turned into a staff of Hashem, while even a mateh Elokim can turn into a serpent in the wrong hands and with the wrong intentions. It all depends on whether one is searching for the truth or for mendacity.
This ideal not to fool ourselves into thinking that evil is good and good is evil was taught long ago in the introduction to the Chovos Halevavos (Lev Tov, page 58). I venture to suggest, with some trepidation, that at least some of the anti-Semitism that we are now experiencing derives from this aspect of our misdirection. Obviously, the world has simply lost its sense of reality. After Eretz Yisroel was brutally and savagely attacked on October 7th/Shemini Atzeres-Simchas Torah, it is we who were vilified, threatened and maligned. We had not yet even attacked Gaza, nor even retaliated for the murders and butchery committed against our innocent children. Yet, evil became lauded and victims were turned into criminals. If we are honest with ourselves — and our rabbeim throughout the centuries do just that — we may see that we have lost our way.
I write these words not out of any hint of superiority, G-d forbid, but out of the pain of hearing and seeing over and over how we are hurting ourselves. When Covid came, we learned to make simchos in tznius, with lowered expectations. Everything turned out just fine. We got married in backyards and basements without crowds. These couples are boruch Hashem married, raising their families, and we are back to the same excess as before. Have we learned nothing? Again, will we be with Paroh or with Moshe Rabbeinu?
I beg everyone to heed the words of Dovid Hamelech, as explained by the Alter of Kelm: “Bakomim olai merei’im tishmana oznai—When those who would harm me rise up against me, my ears have heard” (Tehillim 92:12). Says Rav Simcha Zissel, “Even if someone is criticizing you and you feel that he has the same flaws, perhaps even worse, listen anyway. It is always good to hear the truth, even from a less than perfect source” (Hameoros Hagedolim, page 95).
In order to help distance ourselves from the modern-day Parohs, let’s look more closely at our own incredible leaders. Last year, I was privileged to visit the Rabbeinu Tam Shul. One of our chevrah even began putting on his format of tefillin at that holy place. However, undoubtedly, the best thing that we can do is to follow his ideal to “always admit the truth” (Seder Hadoros 79a). Rav Chaim of Volozhin, the greatest talmid of the Vilna Gaon and founder of the Mother of Yeshivos, once wrote to someone who criticized one of his writings, “You have caught me. I made a mistake and forgot an entire sugya. You were right to point it out and I shall endeavor to study that source” (Chut Hameshulash, No. 17). The Chasam Sofer, too (ibid., page 102), confesses that “it is only human to make a mistake; therefore, if I do, I will state clearly that I am wrong… Thank G-d, in forty years, it only happened twice, once with Rav Zalman Margulies and once with Rav Shmuel Landau. In each case, I thanked them for setting me straight” (ibid., page 102).
In a historical note, the only chief rabbi of New York, Rav Yaakov Yosef, decided to follow the path of Rav Yisroel Salanter, founder of the Mussar Movement, because of a certain event. Rav Yisroel was a genius of incredible proportions and his shiurim in Vilna attracted large crowds of Torah scholars, some of whom were always trying to catch him in some error. One brilliant man in particular made it his life’s purpose to trip up the humble Rav Yisroel. Rav Yisroel treated him respectfully, always carefully responding calmly. However, one time, after the young man had interrupted his shiur and claimed victory, Rav Yisroel thought for a moment and stepped down from the bimah. “You are correct,” he said clearly and forcefully. “I have nothing further to say.” Later, the great baal mussar admitted to his talmidim that in the moment that the interlocutor had claimed that his position was correct, he had five responses to the objections. Nevertheless, he left the stage because he felt that although his answers would be acceptable, including to the objector himself, the truth was more important and the man was right. It was at that moment that Rav Yaakov Yosef of Vilna decided that he must model his life after this man.
It would seem that the time has certainly arrived for us all to search our hearts for what we can do to discover the truth and follow it scrupulously. It is good to remember that the word emes always leads immediately to Go’al Yisroel.
